The Beginning of Things

I was using an Android app that I just downloaded that analyzes all of your (or my) cloud storage accounts and allows you (...or me) to delete duplicates and what not. In the course of my perusing this app, I came across a document I wrote in January 2011. The premise for my writing the note is a bit silly, but I feel like the contents are very meaningful, and it almost feels like a different person (other than myself) wrote them.

So today I wanted to share those thoughts with you all. Have at you!

Do you ever wonder what gets an event started? I just finished watching a movie entitled about “The Social Network,” which is about the creation of Facebook. In the very end of the movie, it became very clear that everything that occurred in the movie happened because of a girl. All kinds of bad - lawsuits, drug usage, lost friendships – all because of a girl’s choice to dump a guy. 

This gets me thinking a little bit more. Are there things, whether good or bad, that I can trace back to a decision I made, or an event that transpired? I’m not necessarily one to adhere to the precepts put forward by the Chaos Theory, but I definitely do believe that some truth is present therein. Could a hurricane off the coast of Florida really be caused by the flapping of a butterfly’s wings in Japan? Personally, I do not believe it does, but I can’t prove that. I can’t prove that spitting at the end of my soccer game didn’t cause climate change in South Africa. Sure, it sounds ridiculous, but who are we to say which events lead to other events. I firmly believe that a higher being is orchestrating this grand existence we call life, but I think a lot of my questions arise in the effect of “How much does He orchestrate?” Is Heavenly Father concerned with the pace at which I walk to school? How can I say he’s not? I don’t know what God has in store for me along that walk. Is it possible that if I walk at 3 M.P.H. rather than 2 that I wouldn’t have been struck by a car, or bike, or bird. 

This is where my mind starts spinning a little. People have become lost because they began dwelling upon what may have happened, so going to the other extreme, I need to stand by my decisions. I chose to walk at a rate of 2 M.P.H. and I’m planning on sticking by that decision.  Ultimately, I think that going to other extreme in this, like in many other things, is counter-productive. Vehemently accepting the results of my actions may prevent opportunities for growth, while permanently becoming fixed on what didn’t happen can equally hinder personal development. So where’s the line to be drawn? 

I don’t intend to write this to make some statement about philosophy. I intend it more as a personal reflection on the decisions that led me to where I am today, for better or for worse. What lead to be interest in computing and technology? How did I develop the somewhat socially awkward personality I have? What is the main thing that inhibits my ability to trust and become close to others? I can definitely think of things that contributed, but I don’t know if I can’t see the beginning, so to speak. 

We’re told, on more than one occasion, in the scriptures, that God can “see the end from the beginning?” It’s impossible to know what’s ahead of us, but I am beginning to think that it’s almost equally impossible to know what lead us to where we are. I suppose that this would be partially why the Lord tells us to “choose ye this day whom ye will serve.” Ultimately, it doesn’t matter who I plan to serve, nor does it matter who I served. When push comes to shove, the only thing that matters is who I am serving, both on this world and off.

Charades and Attention Seeking

I'm not one who enjoys drawing attention to himself. I'm always the type of person that tends to stay near the edges at any kind of social gathering. I would much rather listen to a conversation by two other people than create one on my own. There are few things that will push me away from a party faster than the word "charades". I don't think I'm alone in this, and I would even go so far as to suggest that there may be at least three other people in the state of  Utah who share this opinion. I know, I may be going out on a bit of a limb by suggesting this, but I say it with a large level of confidence. I have often wondered whether it was nature or nurture that made me this way, but the topic of this long-overdue post will be exploring this topic.

As an aside, one of the reason I don't write on the blog much anymore is because I rarely feel like I have good ideas for topics. My major purpose for this blog is to give people a look into the way I think, which I'm told is "unique". I'm writing this as I watch the majority of my family play a charades-like game whilst on vacation. It is moderately ridiculous, but it is highly entertaining from my viewpoint, so I figured this was as good a reason as any to write. To warm you up for what's about to come, here's a joke:

Q: "How do you catch a unique rabbit?"
A: "It doesn't matter because life is meaningless" - Kierkegaard.

Heh. Existentialism is funny.

So, charades and attention seeking (That's the name of this post!) I come from a family of vastly differing personalities. There are those who love being in the spotlight, the comedians, the emotional, the intelligent, the social, the opinionated (as a disclaimer, I don't think one person in my family is embodied by one of these characteristics, so stop taking offense, Steve). While I may embody some of those characteristics listed, I feel like one of the more dominant traits I possess is that of being looked over. That's a trait, right?

What I mean is that I always want to fly under the radar. I like to go about my business and not draw attention to myself. As a child, I would watch my older siblings get in trouble with the parental unit, and I would then make a strong effort to either not do that observed activity, or at least do a better job at covering my tracks.

At work, I'm the same way. I prefer to do my work and not draw attention to my work. I had an encounter with a coworker. He was supervisor for the group with which my group works in close connection. He was showing a new employee around and introducing the new employee to everyone. He came to my cubicle and introduced me, and then he proceeded to explain what I do. After he was done, I injected "I work behind the scenes," and he then said, "Some day you'll need to work in the scene if you want to move up." My response: "And what if I don't care about moving up....." Granted, I believe this response was mostly in my head.

As a side story, does this happen to anyone else: You are walking somewhere, someone asks you a question, you mentally respond, but you never actually respond? Anyone?

I like to consider myself as familial infrastructure. I do what I'm expected to do, and people accept it as normal. I don't really do things that are considered noteworthy, and so I probably don't come up in conversation a ton. That's how I like it.

The problem I have found with this behavior is that in dating, one of the first things that you're supposed to do is set yourself apart from the other suitors. There's pressure to be creative, to stimulate intellectual conversation (but not on a first date, I have found. Apparently it's bad form to discuss my theories on why I think online dating falls short...when on a date with someone I met online), and be charming and witty. I may, at times, be able to fulfill some of the previously stated requirements, but I will admit creativity in dating isn't really...me. Some of these requirements may be due to societal pressures, and some may even be fabricated entirely in my mind (like Steve). I will be reliable. I will do my best to be respectful, but I don't peacock. In fact, I will watch people peacock, and I will just laugh at them....all the way to their wedding dinner.

So, where am I going with this? There's a good chance that if you know the answer to that question, you're already ahead of me. I'm considering this blog post a warm up, since I haven't done it recently, but don't get false hope: most of my posts usually end the same way one of my recent dates ended...with my words kind of just trailing off until they stop, and the post/date ends.

So, if you read this far, I'm sorry because your night must not have a lot going on. What did this post start by talking about? I don't know, but I sure am hungry.


To the fridge!

BADD

Greetings, Interwebs!

It has been a long, long time since I've written anything here, and it's entirely possible that no one will read this except the ghosts which haunt this site. (As an aside, I'm really sorry, but by navigating here, it's entirely possible that you may have opened a gateway to the netherworld. Something about an ancient voodoo curse and not disturbing the remains of a priest - are religious voodoo figures called priests? - but there's good news! Typically, you'll probably only get a ghost or two, maybe a banshee, and although the paranormal screaming can get tiresome, they'll typically only eat a snack or two, have a drink, and then they'll be out of your hair. Just make sure to tuck them in before you go to bed, or they get maaaaaaaaad. Trust me.)

That was a long aside.

The reason why I'm writing today and breaking communication silence is in support of a dear friend who's in an ongoing battle with Getting-Hit-by-a-Drunk-Driver-itis. If you want to see her story, you can go here or here. Personally, I don't have much of a connection to drunk driving....wait, let me try that again. I don't have much of a connection to those that have been affected by drunk driving outside of my aforementioned friend, so I can't relate personal experiences on how this has affected me. I've been able to observe my friend's recovery from a distance, but that's about it. So instead of trying to share some heart warming anecdote, I'm going to simply share a few thoughts I have on the matter.

Not to be over-simplistic or anything, but it really is just stupid. The only real reason I can see for people to get behind the wheel while intoxicated (in any form) is their own pride. People think that they can handle their alcohol (or other substance), and some may even think it would be a sign of weakness to call a cab or arrange for a designated driver. Others may be embarrassed by what they've put in their body, and if they can fool themselves into thinking they're sufficiently cognizant to drive, perhaps they'll continue to fool those around them into thinking they don't have a problem. Perhaps they have some sort of person vendetta against the leprechauns that only appear when they're intoxicated, and so by drinking, it gives them their only chance to track down the leprechaun king and bring this madness to an end...finally. I really don't know the reasons why someone would drive while intoxicated, and I'm not going to pretend to understand someone's motivation for doing so, but really...it needs to end.

I don't know any statistics on drunk driving fatalities. I can't cite references that would go into the neurological effects of intoxication and how it affects cognition. All I know is that I don't drink, none of my closest friends drink, and I rarely have any interaction with those who have been drinking; however, I have still witnessed the effects of drunk driving.

My only wish is that people would sincerely take a step back before planning a night out and take the necessary precautions. Even if you feel capable of driving, there's no shame in being overly cautious. One false move could change not only your life, but the lives of who knows how many people in an instant. If you ever wonder how long a second can last, just ask those who have been involved in an accident where a loved one was injured - fatal or not.

In the mean time, let's continue to spread awareness. Everyone may know it's a problem, but we need to inundate society with this message so that it reaches even those who are the most deaf to it can't help but hear.

PSA: Share the Sidewalks

Over the past year, I have replaced my primary means of transportation. I have gone from strictly relying on my status of being bipedal, to relying on the bi-pedals of my bicycle. With this change in transportation scheme come a fair number of excitements and sometimes excruciating difficulties, and it is upon these facts that I intend to write. I'll point out the fact that I stated that it is purely my intent of remaining on this topic, for those of you who have read my posts in the past would know that "pointed" is hardly a descriptor to be used in description of my rambling writings.

The first topic that comes to mind when I think of "what I've learned while riding a bike" would definitely be how grateful I am for the fact that my bike is a road bike and not a mountain bike. This gratitude appeared as a result of the comparative ease with which I was riding home from class in the HPER E building on the University of Utah campus...the relative ease in comparison with those of my pseudo colleagues who were riding far inferior "mountain" bikes. I credit this ease to the significantly smaller coefficient of kinetic friction caused by the differing materials and patterns present in the respective tires.

Okay, enough of that pretentious writing. I was simply trying to make a point of how annoying it is reading something written by someone who pretends to have a large vocabulary. Now, let's get to the real stuff I wanted to talk about.

While riding a bike, I have discovered that there are very different levels of skill in regards to walking. Seriously though. I have never realized in the past, how difficult it can be for someone to walk in a straight line. I sincerely wish that this difficulty could be blamed on intoxication, but given the fact that people tend to suffer from it at as early as 7:20 in the morning, I either think the problem is with walking itself, or some people really need to cut back.

Let me illustrate an example. I don't mean illustrate as in drawing a picture...bad things would happen if I even attempted that feat. In fact, I'm convinced an orphan dies every time I try to draw something. So, I will merely try to paint a picture with words. Because I know words.

So I'm riding home from class (pretty much entirely downhill), and as I approach someone who is walking in the same direction as me, I make adjustments on the path of my ride as not to hit them...naturally. Then, out of some subconscious desire to be severely injured, the person takes a step to the side, impeding my already-adjusted course. I have to then correct again, and I have to ride off on the grass to avoid the straight line-challenged individual (I know....of all the terrible things that could happen to someone on a road bike, riding on the grass is basically the worst option.)

I have discovered that, more often than not, the person who makes the poor decision of suddenly changing lanes on the sidewalk is playing with their phone. So what is it that causes our internal compass to go all awry when we're looking at an object we often hold way too close to our faces? I think discovering that may be my calling in life.

The other scenario occurs when I'm quickly approaching someone from one direction, and they are walking perpendicular to my path. The person sees the rapidity of my approach, and a sudden sense of uncontrollable fear grips them, and they freeze. Now, mind you, I have determined that my path will not hit them if they proceed at their current rate of travel. So, when they freeze, all of a sudden the variables of my mental calculations have changed, and my solution is no longer valid. This causes a required swerve on my part, and, once again, I end up on the grass.

So, why am I taking the time to write this out. I intend this simply as a public service announcement to those of you who find yourself walking in areas where bicyclers share the lanes of travel.
1)Pick a target at eye level and a reasonable distance, and walk towards it. It's the same principle that they teach in driver's ed (even though you'd think that walking would be that much easier to handle since you've been doing it so much longer than driving.) Don't suddenly change lanes...you never know what's approaching from behind (unless you hear someone yelling "STOP THAT MAN." In which case, I would recommend you do all the "lane changing" that you desire.
2)If you see a biker coming in your direction, don't fear...we won't hit you. If we do, you'll just get insurance money. It's really a win-win situation, so let's overcome that fear. What do you say, patcha?

Share the sidewalks!

A Little Something for You Ute Fans

This won't die just yet. Click on the photo.

Innovation

Okay, I'll admit, the majority of the posts that have accumulated in this-here blog could be easily categorized as "rants," and if you have a problem with that, I would advise that you immediately avert your attention towards something that would be undoubtedly more profitable for you on a intellectual, emotion, physical, and metaphysical level. I bet you're just quaking in your boots, itching to learn what I'm going to rant about today. Well, I am pleased to to announce that you have to wait no longer.....than a short moment while I tell you a COMPLETELY UNRELATED story.

So I was at Subway today grabbing a cheap lunch, and I saw some guy who just looked trashy (judge me all you want, but I look at appearances .) He clearly had his girlfriend with him, and the thought that came to my mind (judge me) was "How would a self-respecting girl really want to be involved with someone who doesn't respect himself." (note: I could only see her from the back.) So she turned around as I was explaining this to my coworker, and I stopped mid-sentence: "Oh, well, that explains that." to everyone: take care of yourself.

So...rant: patents. That's what I'm going to talk about. Patents. Not Patients. Patents. Completely different. If you don't know the difference between patents and patients, I recommend hooked on phonics. I was even nice enough to give you the link right there. Get hooked. Studies have shown that phonics are more  addictive than meth and crack COMBINED. And by studies, I mean "studies," as in, the ones I just made up right now. Actually, it'll probably talk more about litigation of patents, but I guess that works too, right?

The motivation behind this rant is thusly: when I'm at work, and I just can't seem to focus on figuring out code for any longer, I'll peruse some tech blogs. The past couple weeks, these blogs have been riddled with various accounts of companies suing other companies over things claimed as infringement of "intellectual property." Now, I'm extremely far from being a lawyer, but if I understand it properly, intellectual property is essentially an idea that has come to fruition in a tangible form. For example, if you remember from one of my first posts, I brought up an idea for a product that my friend had thought of called the "Spatchet" which is a spatula and hatchet combined to be the ultimate cooking utensil. If I were to build this, I could file for a copyright, or trademark, or a patent. So this is the general idea behind the litigation.

There is a certain company, which I will call A****...hmm, too obvious, I'll call it *pple. So this company developed a tablet device, which some of you may know as the "iPad," which millions and millions of people bought, if for no other reason than they are incapable of using rational thought. (I'm kidding. I'm sure it's a lovely device. It should model.) So this company is in the process of suing Samsung because their tablet device "breaches intellectual property." It was found today, also, that in that litigation is also contained a suit against Motorola for their tablet. Oh, and they're also suing HTC because their devices contain code which also "breaches intellectual property." There are plenty of other instances in which App...I mean, this company is attempting to remove competition. I'm not going to discuss so much the operating system suits as I am those pertaining to the tablet devices. For your information, however, Apple was granted a preliminary injunction against the Samsung Galaxy Tab 10.1 in Germany, preventing sales of that product in any of the European Union nations.

Like I said, I'm far from a legal analyst, so there are probably many little nuances in the law that I just don't understand. I mean, there are reasons why I chose to become an Electrical Engineer....which we won't get into. Apple enthusiasts would claim that Apple is fully justified in their suit because the Samsung tablets resemble the Apple tablets to the point where if you had been drinking, and squinted JUST right, you may get them confused. I mean, their operating systems are virtually identical, right. I should note, that the patent claimed to be infringed are entirely "look and feel" patents, and not relating to the operating system (in these instances.)

The fact that the patents are being "infringed" means that the patents were granted. Here's how I picture it going down. Guy at the patent office gets the application, looks at it, studies it, thinks about it, and thinks to himself, "Yeah, okay, whatever. This will never catch on," and he approves it. I bet he's kicking himself now (the fact that I made conjecture means that it actually happened...in my mind).

But, to be honest, this could all be solved if companies like Samsung would just pull the stick out (I don't know of what), and just alter their design. I mean, what's so bad about sharp corners on a tablet any way? Or, even better, what if instead of having a back-lit LCD screen they used a projector. they could just drape a cloth over the opening and have the images project on to that. Then they could implement a Kinect-like technology and have the whole thing be worked solely through hand motions. Hmmmm....looks like I'll be making a trip to the patent office, if I do say so myself.

What I'm getting at is that this whole thing is ridiculous. I don't like Apple, but I don't hate them (2 years ago I did). Now I've come to the point where I think that anything that spurs on invention and innovation is something that should be encouraged, and it's more important that people find a device that they actually like, rather than one that other people tell them that they should like. In the official Google blog, this is what they said,

         "Instead of competing by building new features or devices, they are fighting through litigation."

That's where my problem with it all lies. So what do you think?

Demon Infested

Let's just get straight to this. I've had something happen to me in the past week that has never happened before. Long story short, my voice is absolutely gone. Like....gone gone. Typically, in the past when my voice was damaged, it would simply drop in pitch. So, instead of hearing my typically semi-whiny, tenor voice, those around me had the privilege of being soothed by my melodic, Barry White-esque tones.  This time, however, the sound production took a sabbatical for an undisclosed amount of time (yes, it's undisclosed. Despite my frequent entreaties to determine the length of its absence, it has yet to respond. I blame that on irresponsibility...or possibly an inability to hear those entreaties.) Because this has never happened to me before, I'm going to share the evolution of such an experience as well as some fun experiences I've had in the mean time (note: I use the term FUN very liberally both in this post and in my personal life. You've been warned.)

It all started Saturday, the 30th of April. I arrived home after enjoying some friend time at about 10 p.m. because I wasn't feeling super great, and I commenced watching some TV show...or something. Well, the coughing started, which prevented my efforts to sleep, so what did I do? Looked at computer components. Yes, the same activity that anyone in their right mind would engage themselves in (As a side note, if you're looking to upgrade computer components, make sure you check compatibility, otherwise the purchase of one item will necessitate the purchase of another, and so on and so forth, and eventually there goes your paycheck.) Eventually, around 3 a.m. I was able to sleep, however, much to my chagrin, I woke up the next morning (the waking up was to my chagrin...on second thought, that makes it sound like I have some sort of death wish, which I don't. Pfff. Pffsh. . Anyway.) Generally speaking, when I wake up, I let out some sort of noise (let your imagination run wild). That day, it was a groan of sorts. I noticed immediately that my efforts to produce sound were hampered by something; I don't know what. (Another side note, being an engineering major, I find that whenever I feel to use a semi-colon, it's basically a leap of faith. And they say my generation is disbelieving and faithless.) As the day progressed, I found I was able to produce lower pitched sounds, but not in the same way as times past (refer to first paragraph if you're confused). I had to consciously make an effort to lower my voice to make any noise, which just wasn't going to work considering how lazy I am. So, whenever I would speak, I would produce some sort of demonic sound that has hints of human speech mixed with voided nothingness. So, that's where I am now. (This explanation was far longer than I expected, but you know how when I start rambling I just kind of go on and on and on and on. If you don't know that, learn it quick...or else (this is not a threat. I have to make sure I say that for legal
reasons) <---Rambling. Case and point.)

The funny things that happened probably won't be funny unless you either visualize them happening to me, or you put yourself in my shoes and imagine how you would react should it happen to you. First thing: I don't know if my parents have short-term memory loss, or if they were intentionally toying with me, but I think that they started asking me more questions when my voice was gone. So I would be walking through the room in which they were, they would ask me a question, and I just had to stop, look at them and shake my head. Funny, right? Right? Okay, moving on. I was at work today. Someone was calling me...no one ever calls me, let alone while I'm at work. As a note (yes, another note), whenever I see someone is calling me, the first thing that goes through my mind is "does [insert callers name here] know they're calling me? I bet it's just a butt-dial." And then I have to evaluate whether or not I should answer. Typically, if I don't answer, I wait to see if they leave a message. If they do leave a message, I know their call was intentional, and I'll return it promptly. That's just for you to note should you ever call me.) Where was I? Ah, yes. Phone call at work. So I looked at my phone to see if I recognized the number. I don't know why I thought that...ever since the introduction of cellular phones, my desire to memorize phone numbers has simply gone to something that's really small. Anyway, I picked up the phone. Here's the conversation as could be overheard:
Me: "            "
Person: "hello?"
Me:
Turns out my short-term memory might not be great as I forgot my voice was gone. Silly me. The third thing that's funny is thusly: I sing...a lot. Whenever I'm alone, I'm singing (unless I'm playing video games...because at that point my focus is very intently...focused...elsewhere.) I get home from work, and I'm listening to a song that has some sort of rousing chorus. So the verse ends, a brief stop, and as I attempt to join in on the chorus, nothing happens. What the...oh yeah. Try it sometime, you'll laugh too, except you will have a voice and you'll sing, which probably will lose all the humor. So, on second though, don't try it.

So yeah, I bet this post was one long "had to be there" type situations, or recounting of situations. Whatever. Die (don't actually....again, for legal purposes.)

As ANOTHER note, I realize that the pictures in the post have absolutely nothing to do with the post itself. I'm just getting bored with purely text-based posts, and I figured a few pictures would spice things up, even if they were irrelevant. What do you think? Good idea? Ptsh. What do you know...

...also, I have no idea what's in that Magic Eye photo, so don't get mad at me if it's, for some reason, vulgar...or vulcan.