From Great Heights

Some have been known to say "practice makes perfect." If that's the case, then I'm about 30 years from being able to walk the trail to Angel's Landing in Zion's National Park blindfolded. Don't misunderstand me, I don't mean to incline anyone that being able to hike that trail without the aide of sight is a high priority in my life (Hence the 30 year deadline). All I'm saying is that for the past three years in a row, I, along with my fraternity, have made a Spring Break trip to St. George, and with the trip comes a day-trip to Zion's and a hike to Angel's Landing. For anyone who hasn't made that jaunt (no, it's MUCH more than a jaunt...I just like how that word sounds), I would highly recommend it. It...is....awesome.


This is a view from the top of the hike. What you can't see, however, is the journey. Any words I could write wouldn't do it justice, but it's intense. There's roughly a 2500 ft. increase throughout the course of about a mile and a half (about). If you ever want to know what it feels like to LITERALLY (not literally) have your calf muscles on fire, this is definitely a good start. A little (long) while ago, I wrote about the behaviors of some of the people in my fraternity, and the same people definitely surprised me on this hike. At the summit, there's a very, very large cliff on 3 sides of you. Common sense would dictate caution under such circumstances. Perhaps it's something about youth, but certain of the younger fellows I know thought it would be a good idea to run and jump around. One even went so far as to throw a rather large rock from the top. Was there really an immediate danger about doing such a thing? No, probably not, BUT I've taken physics. The energy he has to transfer into that rock in order to throw it has to be negated by a backwards force on him. If there were any chance that throwing the rock could move me in any way for any reason, and if I had a thousand foot fall on either side of me, there's a good chance I wouldn't do it. Call me overly-cautious, but that's just how I roll. All I could do was shake my head.

Another thing that permeates society is that dependence on any substance trends negatively (I don't really know what that means either). In other words, if we are dependent on any external substance, it's bad. I learned something on this hike, however. There are instances where dependence on something external in this hike is nothing short of required. You probably can't see it very well, but there's a ridge in the photo to the left. Basically, you're scaling the lip of the ridge with drops on either side, holding on to chains that have been mounted in the mountain, and you're holding on for DEAR LIFE. Granted, I don't think it's stuff like this that they're referring to when people say dependencies, but I think it fits. Yes, I do. and you can't do anything about it.


There's something about hikes that makes me impatient. I love the journey about a hike. I love the scenery, but, most of all, I love the feeling of accomplishment created by reaching the summit. What I don't like, however, is the trip back. I mean, I've already been here today! If i could find a hike that didn't involve doubling back for the return, that would....I don't know...be cool...Until then, I've discovered a good way to make the return journey a bit more enjoyable for myself: running. It doesn't matter how steep the trail is (yes it does. There is no way in...you know...that I would run down the face of a cliff I had to climb with the help of chains), running makes the return journey go by faster, and it adds a whole other dimension in the...thing. Yeah. I forgot what I was saying.


I'm all about balance. If I spend time one day eating nothing but sweets, I begin to crave something salty. If I eat too much meat, I begin wanting vegetables. If I spend all day listening to Josh Groban, I....listen to....The Used...? (I don't know what the opposite of Josh Groban is). ANYWAY, the burning invoked in my calves by the journey to the summit created an imbalance in my lower extremities. What's the best way to counter that? Oh, well, how about that, it's by running down the trail. If you've never run downhill for a mile and a half, I would strongly recommend it. The jelly-like feeling created in your quads is like...awesome. I dont' know how to describe it, but it feels like someone LITERALLY (not literally) injected a pint of pudding into each of my legs. If that doesn't create an image you really want to forget, but for some reason can't, I don't know what will. It is awesome.


Here's the moral of the story:
1) Don't throw rocks from high places, because the rock will push you backwards and you will fall and die.
2) If you're going to become dependent on anything, make it be chains while scaling a cliff. Just saying.
3) Not only is pudding great for eating, it's awesome when injected into the legs.
4) If you ever see or hear someone use the word literally, there's a good chance they didn't actually mean LITERALLY.
5) Ivan Drago is the greatest Movie villain ever (if you didn't catch that from my post, reread it. It's in there...somewhere)


Lastly, if you want to take a look at all the fun-ness had on the hike, here's a link to the pictures I took.


Angel's Landing '010