Today is definitely one of my favorite days of the year. Thanksgiving. Perusing Facebook posts yields public affirmations of what people truly appreciate...at least for this one day. I feel like I have a lot to be thankful for, but I never think that Facebook is the best place for me to discuss them, as the things I tend to focus on aren't on the macro scale. Sure, I'm thankful for the things like family, shelter, food, a good job, school, etc., but I tend to try to think of the frequently overlooked commodities in life. In this post I'm going to discuss just a couple things I'm thankful for and why I appreciate their existence.
First, I would like to express my gratitude for new socks. Sure, clothes in general are a wonderful thing, and I love socks, but I don't feel like there is anything more luxurious than the feel of new socks (sure, some of you may argue that living in a mansion with maids and butlers and gold door knobs and ivory...bathtubs and drinking fountains that can read your mind would be more luxurious, but for us normal folk, I would say new socks is definitely up there.) Let me ask you this question: have you ever been on a camping trip where it gets bleeding cold at night? Have you ever changed into a new pair of socks right before going to bed? Well, if you haven't, I would HIGHLY recommend that you do so, because it is heaven. Serious. Like, when I think of heaven, I think of new socks...and possibly all-you-can-eat pudding... preferably not out of the socks, but I'm not entirely opposed to that idea. So, socks = good.
Second, I want to express my gratitude for the concept of tolerance. No, I'm not talking about tolerance as it's most frequently used in the media these days. I'm talking more about the concept of tolerance for bad humor, and how much of it I make my friends put up with. Seriously. Let me give you an example: I was at a friends house, and someone said to someone else (not me) "looks like you're on the hot-seat," and I added, "literally, you're on the hot seat...because you're sitting in front of the fireplace." Awful, although it was followed by a weird arm-shake dance thing. I mean, in a world where people didn't tolerate bad humor, I likely would have been shot on the spot, even though there's little to no chance that I would have made it past my 9th birthday. So people, thank you for tolerating.
Third, I want to say how grateful I am for the fact that my car hasn't exploded. Sure, it's not TECHNICALLY my car, but the meaning is the same. Let me let you in on a little routine that goes through my head when I'm leaving for work. I get my badge, car keys, and then think "Gee, I really hope my car doesn't explode while I'm in it today." And it has yet to do that. I have to admit, however, that I would probably just laugh hysterically if it were to explode. I mean, I've been telling people it's going to happen for years now, and it hasn't yet. Hopefully by writing this I'm not jinxing myself. Keep your fingers crossed, people.
Lastly, and on a lot more serious note, I want to thank the people that help make my life worthwhile. I've been richly blessed with talents and abilities, but in my eyes, all of that would be worthless if I didn't have people around me to give me opportunities to use those talents for a greater good. So, if you're one of the people who has allowed me to be a part of your life, I wish to offer you my sincerest and most humble thanks. I can pretty much guarantee that I have gained far more as a result of it than I possibly could have given back. Also, I want to thank all you people for putting up with my sometimes less-than-welcoming nature (by that, I mean the rude comments I make betimes. It's never intended maliciously; I can guarantee that.) So if you've been the recipient of one of those types of comments, thank you for not murdering me. I genuinely appreciate it.
I wish everyone the happiest of Thanksgivings possible. Let's have today be the beginning of a year full of thanksgiving and not allow it to be limited to a single day.
Oh yeah, and Go Utes!
Thursday, November 25, 2010
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Creaky Joints? Here's the Solution.
There are few things in this life as predictable as weather: gas prices, thoroughbred horse racing, women, hot pockets (what?), but I do not intend to dwell upon the more finicky aspects of life and chance. With the cold season (weather, not disease) approaching, and because there seems to be so much discussion about the bad elements thereof, I want to discuss briefly some of the more favorable qualities of the winter season.
First, everyone is always giving me a hard time about how much time I spend in front of the computer. "You're so lazy," they say. "Why are you on your computer so much? Go outside." Well, during the winter season, all I have to do is give one excuse, and one excuse alone: it's cold. And from 90% of my critics the response is, "yes, that's true. It is cold, but what does that have to do with you not going outside?" Usually, at this time I just storm off in a fit and start throwing things, not because I'm mad, but to make a point. What point is that? The fact that things break. I'm simply trying to educate here, people. We can't go about thinking that objects are indestructible...because they're not (unless you're throwing around an indestructible metal rod, in which case it won't break).
Anyway, the second thing I love about the weather is the benefit to the economy. Sure, a lot of travel agencies may suffer, like those giving trips to Yellowstone, but think of it this way: there is a definite boon for the chocolate industry. Sure, times like Valentine's Day and...other holidays may help them out quite a bit, but the increased demand for hot chocolate (maybe this is just my excessively Utahn paradigm coming out) surely must be something the chocolate accountants (don't be fooled: this means they're accountants for the chocolate company, not accountants made out of chocolate. Trust me, this is not a mistake you want to make) are grateful for. Also, I think that was the most broken up and hard to follow sentence I've written in a while. Just remember, parenthetical statements aren't planned, they just happen...kind of like some pregnancies.
The third thing I love about the winter is that I daily get to do battle with my nemesis: the wind. Sure, some of you may say "how can you have a nemesis that you can't see, grasp, or even fight?" Well, to you I say, Learn Newton's Laws, jerk. I will refute your comment thusly: I may not be able to see the wind, but it's not like the wind can see me. I mean, it doesn't even have eyes. So looks like we're on equal ground there. Also, you say I can't grasp the wind? Well, I guess that depends on whether you are referring to the concept of physically or intellectually grasping the wind. Because I understand it, so eat those words. And I fight the wind all the time, but most of the time I just do it by playing Starcraft. Trust me, it works. Or at least that's what I'll keep telling myself.
So there it is. Just like I said. Three things I like about winter. Sure, they may not "make sense," but they do, so there. If you have anything you also love about winter, feel free to comment it. In the mean time, I'm going to go do battle. ROCK!
Oh, one last thing, as promised, the solution to creaky joints is just putting a splint on every joint you have. They can't creak if they can't bend, right?
First, everyone is always giving me a hard time about how much time I spend in front of the computer. "You're so lazy," they say. "Why are you on your computer so much? Go outside." Well, during the winter season, all I have to do is give one excuse, and one excuse alone: it's cold. And from 90% of my critics the response is, "yes, that's true. It is cold, but what does that have to do with you not going outside?" Usually, at this time I just storm off in a fit and start throwing things, not because I'm mad, but to make a point. What point is that? The fact that things break. I'm simply trying to educate here, people. We can't go about thinking that objects are indestructible...because they're not (unless you're throwing around an indestructible metal rod, in which case it won't break).
Anyway, the second thing I love about the weather is the benefit to the economy. Sure, a lot of travel agencies may suffer, like those giving trips to Yellowstone, but think of it this way: there is a definite boon for the chocolate industry. Sure, times like Valentine's Day and...other holidays may help them out quite a bit, but the increased demand for hot chocolate (maybe this is just my excessively Utahn paradigm coming out) surely must be something the chocolate accountants (don't be fooled: this means they're accountants for the chocolate company, not accountants made out of chocolate. Trust me, this is not a mistake you want to make) are grateful for. Also, I think that was the most broken up and hard to follow sentence I've written in a while. Just remember, parenthetical statements aren't planned, they just happen...kind of like some pregnancies.
The third thing I love about the winter is that I daily get to do battle with my nemesis: the wind. Sure, some of you may say "how can you have a nemesis that you can't see, grasp, or even fight?" Well, to you I say, Learn Newton's Laws, jerk. I will refute your comment thusly: I may not be able to see the wind, but it's not like the wind can see me. I mean, it doesn't even have eyes. So looks like we're on equal ground there. Also, you say I can't grasp the wind? Well, I guess that depends on whether you are referring to the concept of physically or intellectually grasping the wind. Because I understand it, so eat those words. And I fight the wind all the time, but most of the time I just do it by playing Starcraft. Trust me, it works. Or at least that's what I'll keep telling myself.
So there it is. Just like I said. Three things I like about winter. Sure, they may not "make sense," but they do, so there. If you have anything you also love about winter, feel free to comment it. In the mean time, I'm going to go do battle. ROCK!
Oh, one last thing, as promised, the solution to creaky joints is just putting a splint on every joint you have. They can't creak if they can't bend, right?
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