So today I wanted to share those thoughts with you all. Have at you!
Do you ever wonder what gets an event started? I just finished watching a movie entitled about “The Social Network,” which is about the creation of Facebook. In the very end of the movie, it became very clear that everything that occurred in the movie happened because of a girl. All kinds of bad - lawsuits, drug usage, lost friendships – all because of a girl’s choice to dump a guy.
This gets me thinking a little bit more. Are there things, whether good or bad, that I can trace back to a decision I made, or an event that transpired? I’m not necessarily one to adhere to the precepts put forward by the Chaos Theory, but I definitely do believe that some truth is present therein. Could a hurricane off the coast of Florida really be caused by the flapping of a butterfly’s wings in Japan? Personally, I do not believe it does, but I can’t prove that. I can’t prove that spitting at the end of my soccer game didn’t cause climate change in South Africa. Sure, it sounds ridiculous, but who are we to say which events lead to other events. I firmly believe that a higher being is orchestrating this grand existence we call life, but I think a lot of my questions arise in the effect of “How much does He orchestrate?” Is Heavenly Father concerned with the pace at which I walk to school? How can I say he’s not? I don’t know what God has in store for me along that walk. Is it possible that if I walk at 3 M.P.H. rather than 2 that I wouldn’t have been struck by a car, or bike, or bird.
This is where my mind starts spinning a little. People have become lost because they began dwelling upon what may have happened, so going to the other extreme, I need to stand by my decisions. I chose to walk at a rate of 2 M.P.H. and I’m planning on sticking by that decision. Ultimately, I think that going to other extreme in this, like in many other things, is counter-productive. Vehemently accepting the results of my actions may prevent opportunities for growth, while permanently becoming fixed on what didn’t happen can equally hinder personal development. So where’s the line to be drawn?
I don’t intend to write this to make some statement about philosophy. I intend it more as a personal reflection on the decisions that led me to where I am today, for better or for worse. What lead to be interest in computing and technology? How did I develop the somewhat socially awkward personality I have? What is the main thing that inhibits my ability to trust and become close to others? I can definitely think of things that contributed, but I don’t know if I can’t see the beginning, so to speak.
We’re told, on more than one occasion, in the scriptures, that God can “see the end from the beginning?” It’s impossible to know what’s ahead of us, but I am beginning to think that it’s almost equally impossible to know what lead us to where we are. I suppose that this would be partially why the Lord tells us to “choose ye this day whom ye will serve.” Ultimately, it doesn’t matter who I plan to serve, nor does it matter who I served. When push comes to shove, the only thing that matters is who I am serving, both on this world and off.
